The Simpsons must sell an old family heirloom in order to pay for a $900 gas bill. The family meets John, the owner of the collectibles store, who offers to check out their many posessions for any value. Homer takes a liking to him, but Marge informs him that John is gay. Homer refuses to see John again, but notices Bart's behavior has changed since he had been with John. Homer tries to make Bart more 'manly' but in the process, takes him to a gay steel mill. Homer, Moe, and Barney take Bart deer hunting. They find themselves a reindeer pen and the men urge Bart to kill one. He refuses, and the herd gets aggressive towards the group. As the reindeer begin to attack, John arrives with a remote-controlled Stanta which neutralizes the herd. Homer thanks John for saving his life.

Previous Episodes covered:
01. Flaming Moes
02. Homerpalooza
03. A Star Is Burns
04. Homer At The Bat
05/06. Who Shot Mr. Burns (parts 1 & 2)
07. Selma’s Choice
08. Bart’s Friend Falls In Love
09. Cape Feare
10. Behind The Laughter
11. Bart Gets An Elephant
12. Duffless
13. The Homer They Fall
14. Bart Gets Famous
15. Two Bad Neighbors

Marge: I have something that I'd like to sell.
John: Please tell me it's your hair.
Marge: [flattered, giggles] No. It's an heirloom my grandmother passed down to me. A very rare, old figurine from the Civil War.
Lisa: Please don't construe our ownership of this as an endorsement of slavery.
John: [eyes the doll] Hmm. Well see, here's the thing on this. It's a Johnny Reb bottle, early 1970s, one of the J & R Whiskey "Liquor Lads." 2 books of green stamps, if I'm not mistaken.
Marge: Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no, no. It's a very, very old figurine.
John: No, it's a liquor bottle. [untwists a cap from the bottle] See?
[pours himself some whiskey and drinks it]
That'll make your bull run.
Marge: Well... I guess it'll always be a monument to Grandma's secret drinking problem.

John: Oh, I've got the exact same curtains, only in my bathroom. Didn't you just die when you found these?
Marge: Not really. They just had corn on them. Kitchen... Corn...
John: Oh!
[slaps Marge on the arm in an "Oh You!" manner]
[Marge snickers and taps John back]
[Bart tries and imitate them, more-or-less punching Homer]
Homer: Oww! Why you little...!
[strangles Bart]
Bart: Aaah! Dad! Dad! Company! Company!
Homer: [stops] Oh. I'll just be another minute, John. Have a seat.
[resumes strangling]

Homer: Ohmygod Ohmygod Ohmygod! Oh my god! I danced with a gay! Marge, Lisa, promise me you won't tell anyone. [shaking Lisa] Promise me!!
Marge: You're being ridiculous.
Homer: Am I, Marge? Am I? Think of the property values. Now we can never say only straight people have been in this house.

this is the season where everything starts to go downhill....


that being said.

okay episode it has funny parts ,

taking bart to the steel mill was funny.

I thought it was quite good. The Steel Mill part was particularly funny for me. I really cant remember quotes like the rest of you which is annoying...

Barney has the best one-liner in this one:

Barney: Is it all right to come out now, Mr. Gay Man...sir?



Moe: Yeah, we'll do anything. Anything! (shifty eyes)
Barney: Aw, Moe, we were saved by a sissy.
Moe: Yeah, yeah, we'll never live it down. Oh, boy, it looks like it's suicide again for me.

i had never seen this episode until i got the season 8 dvd's

deffinately a highlight for the season

Homer: You know me Marge. I like my beer cold, my TV loud, and my homosexuals flaaaaaaaaaaaaming.

John: Homer, what have you got against gays?
Homer: You know! It's not... usual. If there was a law, it'd be against it!
Marge: Oh Homer, please! You're embarrassing yourself.
Homer: No I'm not, Marge! They're embarrasing me. They're embarrassing America. They turned the Navy into a floating joke. They ruined all our best names like Bruce, and Lance, and Julian. Those were the toughest names we had! Now they're just, uh...
John: Queer?
Homer: Yeah, and that's another thing! I resent you people using that word. That's our word for making fun of you! We need it!!

Roscoe: [to all] Hey! Listen up! I want all of youse to say hello to the Simpsons.
All: [waving in a cliche, sissy-like attitude] Hello-o.
Homer: [gasps] Has the whole world gone insane?!
Worker #1: [sissy-like] Stand still, there's a spark in your hair!
Worker #2: Get it! Get it!
Homer: [whimpers]
[another guy walks past Homer holding a vat of hot steel in hot pants]
Worker #3: Hot stuff, comin' through!
Homer: [screams]
Bart: Dad, why'd you bring me to a gay steel mill?
Homer: [frightened] I don't know! This is a NIGHTMARE! YOU'RE ALL SICK!
Worker #4: [waving his hand] Oh be nice!
Homer: Oh! My son doesn't stand a chance! The whole world's gone gay!
[a whistle goes off]
Oh my god! What's happening now?
Roscoe: We work hard. We play hard. [pulls a chain]
["Everybody Dance Now" starts playing]

Lisa: (whispers) He thinks you're gay.
Bart: He thinks I'm gay?

Homer: There's only two kind of guys who wear those shirts: gay guys and big, fat party animals. And Bart doesn't look like a big, fat party animal to me...

Smithers: John...
John: Oh, Waylon. I'd like ya to meet the Simpsons.
Smithers: I know the Simpsons. (in John's ear) So this is your "sick mother"?
John: Don't do this to me, Waylon.

Homer: That John is the greatest guy in the world. We've gotta have him and his wife over for drinks sometime.
Marge: Hmm, I don't think he's married, Homer.
Homer: Oh, a swinging bachelor, eh? Well, there's lots of foxy ladies out there.
Marge: Homer, didn't John seem a little... festive to you?
Homer: Couldn't agree more, happy as a clam.
Marge: He prefers the company of men.
Homer: Who doesn't?

Moe: You ever been hunting before, there, Barty?
Bart: Nope. Something about a bunch of guys alone together in the woods... seems kinda gay.

Barney: Aw, we should have stayed at the bar and shot some rats.
Moe: Hey! Those ain't your rats, Barn.

Moe: Come on, don't take this so hard, Homer. You still got that other kid, uh... Lisa. Let's, uh, take her out hunting tomorrow, make her into a man.
Homer: Aw, she'd never go. She's a "vegetarian."
Moe: Oh, geez, Homer, geez! You and Marge ain't cousins, are ya?

I'm going to stop before I copy and paste the entire script.
Hilarious episode.

haha...this is so true.

A guy named Artie does quizzo every Tueday night at the bar where I work. He's a big fat guy and he was wearing a Hawaiian shirt last week. I was silently laughing my ass off and couldn't stop thinking of this line.

I'm going to watch this episode right now on brilliant season 8 dvd.