And your X, yes, it may numb you
And your X, yes, it may dull the pain
But your X, does it heal you?
Take away the black shadow that lurks in your heart
Ready to swallow you up again
Your X takes you into its arms
Cradles you softly and sings to you sweetly
Numbs you so easily, hard to believe that it's
Not the answer
To your prayers
Blunts all the edges
Sharp edges that hurt you
And harm you and bleed you and bruise you and kill you
Your X
Takes it away
Takes it away
Takes it away
Takes you away...
Cradles you softly
And suffocates slowly
And cradles you softly
And suffocates...
Joined: Tue May 30, 2006 2:48 pm Posts: 3115 Location: Edinburgh/Lincoln, UK
I like this..it's kind of bittersweet in that there's a suggestion of something appearing to be full of love, though when looked at a little deeper, is actually something almost preventing love, or restricting it.
I also liked the use of 'x', it makes it easy to relate to, and gives a real sense of distance between the two people ('you' and x'), and also takes away their human qualities - 'x' makes it sound like a product or machine rather than a person.
If you're familiar with Fitter Happier by Radiohead, i can picture a similar voice reading this poem out, particularly the end part.
I like this..it's kind of bittersweet in that there's a suggestion of something appearing to be full of love, though when looked at a little deeper, is actually something almost preventing love, or restricting it.
I also liked the use of 'x', it makes it easy to relate to, and gives a real sense of distance between the two people ('you' and x'), and also takes away their human qualities - 'x' makes it sound like a product or machine rather than a person.
If you're familiar with Fitter Happier by Radiohead, i can picture a similar voice reading this poem out, particularly the end part.
Thanks very much, glad to know you like it. I've been messing around with this one for a while, still can't decide if I'm happy with it or not. I'm still kind of sitting on the fence with the 'x' thing, I don't know if 'poison' would fit better...I'm kind of iffy as to whether 'x' pushes it too far on the unspecified front, and I think maybe it disrupts the flow a little. Any suggestions on that front?
Joined: Tue May 30, 2006 2:48 pm Posts: 3115 Location: Edinburgh/Lincoln, UK
skunkthecat wrote:
iceagecoming wrote:
I like this..it's kind of bittersweet in that there's a suggestion of something appearing to be full of love, though when looked at a little deeper, is actually something almost preventing love, or restricting it.
I also liked the use of 'x', it makes it easy to relate to, and gives a real sense of distance between the two people ('you' and x'), and also takes away their human qualities - 'x' makes it sound like a product or machine rather than a person.
If you're familiar with Fitter Happier by Radiohead, i can picture a similar voice reading this poem out, particularly the end part.
Thanks very much, glad to know you like it. I've been messing around with this one for a while, still can't decide if I'm happy with it or not. I'm still kind of sitting on the fence with the 'x' thing, I don't know if 'poison' would fit better...I'm kind of iffy as to whether 'x' pushes it too far on the unspecified front, and I think maybe it disrupts the flow a little. Any suggestions on that front?
I prefer 'X' to 'poison'...i like that X leaves it completely open. Replacing that limits how open the interpretion can be (i guess i like the unspecified front). Though, when being read aloud, 'poison' perhaps flows better...so there's a good argument for both..
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest
You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot post attachments in this forum