C. Blazer was pointing out the irony in an atheist wondering whether God was telling him something.

I missed that little joke and nobody else in this thread pointed it out.

so, please, what dead horse?

whatever.... fatso.

In the previous months an accummulation of bad things have happened to me causing me to think "Why the heck is this happening, is someone or something trying to push me into committing suicide?" I don't know what my life will be like in 10 years, but I can't see how I'll survive the next year since I'm lonely (not whining about it), don't have many friends, etc. Some people say I'm weird. Someone told me that many people in my office dislike me because of it. I've tried to become friends with many of them. I feel like I am forcing myself into their world. I show up at their parties and gatherings because I see them posted in the facebook groups but I always get confused reactions like "we didn't invite you."
My life is not unbearable, but I'd like to have friends and people to talk to and maybe a girlfriend. I just feel completely worthless to everybody.

But anyway, is someone/something trying to tell me that I should commit suicide? When I think about it, all these things that happened to me lately feel like a someone's trying to make me realize that I have no future and that not many people would miss me if I died. Maybe my existence was supposed to be brief and I'm here for some reason, and now God (or something) wants to take me to "heaven"?

(Note: I'm an atheist and I'm not depressed or suicidal)
Oh, and I suddenly had a brief "realisation" that I'm not supposed to be alive and that I should die. It disappeared quickly, but for the few seconds it was there it seemed like it was super obvious that I'm supposed to be dead, as if it was the natural state. Was this another attempt by the "god" to "call me back" and finish my "mission" or whatever?

Oh, and good luck. Just remember, life isn't a quick dash, it's a relay race.