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Is God telling me to commit suicide?
http://archive.theskyiscrape.com/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=100015		 Page 1 of 3
Author:  thuss65 [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 12:56 am ]
Post subject:  Is God telling me to commit suicide?
In the previous months an accummulation of bad things have happened to me causing me to think "Why the heck is this happening, is someone or something trying to push me into committing suicide?" I don't know what my life will be like in 10 years, but I can't see how I'll survive the next year since I'm lonely (not whining about it), don't have many friends, etc. Some people say I'm weird. Someone told me that many people in my office dislike me because of it. I've tried to become friends with many of them. I feel like I am forcing myself into their world. I show up at their parties and gatherings because I see them posted in the facebook groups but I always get confused reactions like "we didn't invite you."
My life is not unbearable, but I'd like to have friends and people to talk to and maybe a girlfriend. I just feel completely worthless to everybody.

But anyway, is someone/something trying to tell me that I should commit suicide? When I think about it, all these things that happened to me lately feel like a someone's trying to make me realize that I have no future and that not many people would miss me if I died. Maybe my existence was supposed to be brief and I'm here for some reason, and now God (or something) wants to take me to "heaven"?

(Note: I'm an atheist and I'm not depressed or suicidal)
Oh, and I suddenly had a brief "realisation" that I'm not supposed to be alive and that I should die. It disappeared quickly, but for the few seconds it was there it seemed like it was super obvious that I'm supposed to be dead, as if it was the natural state. Was this another attempt by the "god" to "call me back" and finish my "mission" or whatever?
Author:  thodoks [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 1:34 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
No, he isn't.

Go buy a used guitar and learn to play it. Check out a library book you've always wanted to read. There are homeless shelters, women's shelters, and hospice and retirement communities begging for volunteers; go make someone else's day, week, month, year. Wake up early tomorrow and watch the sun rise. Send an old friend or relative with whom you've lost contact a friendly note. Sign up for cooking classes and learn how to make an amazing lasagna. Take piano or voice lessons. Learn a craft. Do something nice for someone who will never find out. But FFS, don't kill yourself.

And stop calling Jeff Ament.
Author:  Harmless [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 1:45 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
No, he / she / it isn't. God wants you alive, so that you can find whatever it is that fulfils you, even if it's nothing that assumes to tell you how to live, like religion. Find your own path, know that you're allowed to, even that it's necessary.
Author:  McParadigm [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 2:16 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
Live an ordinary life, full of pain and love and loss. And then really, really wish you could do it again. And please, before you use any reactions to this thread to measure your future, remember how thoroughly thodoks sucks. For the love of god, remember how much he sucks.
Author:  bmacsmith [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 2:40 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
sounds like indigestion to me.
Author:  Skitch Patterson [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 2:57 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
In the first two episodes of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Princess Celestia sends her star pupil Twilight Sparkle to Ponyville, just as she is beginning her research into the sinster Nightmare Moon. Twilight attempts to continue her studies, and meets Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Rarity and Fluttershy. As they attend a gigantic ball, Nightmare Moon returns from exile and kidnaps Princess Celestia. Twilights first reaction is to return to Canterlot to help rescue Princess Celestia.. until her and friends discover the Elements of Harmony, each one representing a trait of an individual Pony. But its not enough to defeat Nightmare Moon, until Twilight Sparkle discovers the final element.... friendship. And with the help of the Elements of Harmony, they defeat Nightmare Moon, thereby freeing Princess Celestia and her long lost sister Princess Luna.
Author:  Human Bass [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 3:30 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
Watch more Adventure Time, enroll in a jiu-jitsu gym.
Author:  turned2black [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 3:43 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
Run more.
Author:  Dev [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 4:29 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
you're probably a good guy but you must know that thinking there is some unknown entity wanting you to kill yourself is delusional. I mean that in the most literal way. It is not as an insult or anything. You are looking for meaning where there is none, it is a fantasy. You cannot give any credence to any of those thoughts.

Depression is shitty, just keep looking for a place where you can find happiness. I would never have guessed 6 years ago where I'd be today. I was the most depressed fucked up guy(still a little weirdo I guess) but the point is that I genuinely enjoy my life now, so don't think that any amount of obstacles are insurmountable. Just keep pushing and if you believe things can change then you will probably find a way to make that happen.

Also I recommend the movie jeff who lives at home. that shit is an emotional rollercoaster.
Author:  bmacsmith [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 5:05 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
Skitch Patterson wrote:
In the first two episodes of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Princess Celestia sends her star pupil Twilight Sparkle to Ponyville, just as she is beginning her research into the sinster Nightmare Moon. Twilight attempts to continue her studies, and meets Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Rarity and Fluttershy. As they attend a gigantic ball, Nightmare Moon returns from exile and kidnaps Princess Celestia. Twilights first reaction is to return to Canterlot to help rescue Princess Celestia.. until her and friends discover the Elements of Harmony, each one representing a trait of an individual Pony. But its not enough to defeat Nightmare Moon, until Twilight Sparkle discovers the final element.... friendship. And with the help of the Elements of Harmony, they defeat Nightmare Moon, thereby freeing Princess Celestia and her long lost sister Princess Luna.

spare me your folksy homespun wisdom.
Author:  pjcowgirl [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 5:45 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
There's some really good advice here but as a Mother of a very unstable teenager who has seen more than 1 suicide attempt, I think I can understand that other people's advice just doesn't always help.

Society is generally very unaccepting of anyone who "doesn't fit the mould"....... and I guess one thing I can suggest is that you won't make yourself happy by trying to fit it in or make others happy. You really need to look after number 1 and, if you can see clear (a fucking hard path!) you need to find what it takes to make you happier.

As thodoks said tho' FFS don't kill yourself - it really leaves a mass trail of devastation for those who love you. Take small steps, one problem at a time and be good to yourself. Bad shit happens to good people all the time. I hope you get through this and quickly, and at the end of it, you'll look back and see it has made you stronger than you would have realised.

I wish you all good luck and if I was a praying person, I'd be praying for you right now.
Author:  Jammer91 [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 5:59 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
Sanity, you're doing it wrong.
Author:  dimejinky99 [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 9:29 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
Keep yourself busy and start doing some sort of exercise. Walking even or cycling are great for getting your blood going and blowing the dark cobwebs out of your head.
Don't compare yourself to anyone else. Or try not to. It'll all come to you in time. Keep goin.
Author:  Skitch Patterson [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 12:36 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
PS: I am really interested in sampling the lasagna of the thodoks account
Author:  lord vedder [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 3:01 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
You say you're not depressed or suicidal but sounds like you may need help. No one is "telling" you to kill yourself. If you feel that way you need psychological help. There shouldn't be shame in that anymore than going to a medical doctor if you're having persistant chest pains.
You do say that not many will miss you if you were to suddenly leave. First those that do love you will be completely devistated. The sting of grieving a suicide is not the same as grieving other kinds of death. And second I can promise you're a part of more people's lives than you think you are. How we see ourselves is not always the same as others see us.
We all go through times when we're feeling lonely and that we're an outsider. Personally myself I've had a lot of friends either move away or get married and/or have babies so my social life is not what it was this time last year. I'm also a single guy well into my 30s and making new friends isn't as easy as it used to be either. I'm sure some people think I'm wierd. Plus I'm a natural introvert. I'm not saying I'm in your situation but I can probably empathize with you to a certain extent.
It can be tough living in our own skin. I truly hope you're able to find a way to cope with how things are going for you and that you can be happy and content with yourself and your life.
Author:  VinylGuy [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 5:02 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
Life is difficult...you have ups and downs, more easy moments, more bitchy ones...suicide shouldnt be a option.
I get your view, specially because you are trapped in that moment...stuck. I have been there ( kinda am) and its really though.
Overall, there is a lot of things you can do, and keeping yourself busy could be a good choice...even for those days were you just cant left a fork.
Stay strong.
Author:  Harmless [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 5:07 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
VinylGuy wrote:
Life is difficult...you have ups and downs, more easy moments, more bitchy ones...suicide shouldnt be a option.
I get your view, specially because you are trapped in that moment...stuck. I have been there ( kinda am) and its really though.
Overall, there is a lot of things you can do, and keeping yourself busy could be a good choice...even for those days were you just cant lift a fork.
Stay strong.


Come on man, not even I have those days.
Author:  knee tunes [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 5:20 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
Harmless wrote:
VinylGuy wrote:
Life is difficult...you have ups and downs, more easy moments, more bitchy ones...suicide shouldnt be a option.
I get your view, specially because you are trapped in that moment...stuck. I have been there ( kinda am) and its really though.
Overall, there is a lot of things you can do, and keeping yourself busy could be a good choice...even for those days were you just cant lift a fork.
Stay strong.


Come on man, not even I have those days.



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Author:  corduroy_blazer [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 5:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
Subject: Is God telling me to commit suicide?

thuss65 wrote:
(Note: I'm an atheist)


...
Author:  Skitch Patterson [ Fri Nov 23, 2012 6:17 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Is God telling me to commit suicide?
man, I love harmless
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