Gay couple denied communion after stand

After taking a public stand for same-sex marriage, a gay couple were notified they are no longer welcome at Catholic communion.
By KATHLEEN MILLER
Associated Press

GILLETTE, Wyo. --
Leah Vader and Lynne Huskinson, a lesbian couple who got married in Canada in August, sent a letter recently to their state legislator decrying a Wyoming bill that would deny recognition of same-sex marriages. The lawmaker read the letter on the floor of the Legislature.

Soon after, the local paper interviewed the couple on Ash Wednesday and ran a story and pictures of them with ash on their foreheads, a mark of their Christian faith.

It wasn't long after that that the couple received a notice from their parish church telling them they have been barred from receiving Communion.

''If all this stuff hadn't hit the newspaper, it wouldn't have been any different than before -- nobody would have known about it,'' said the couple's parish priest at St. Matthew's, the Rev. Cliff Jacobson. ``The sin is one thing. It's a very different thing to go public with that sin.''

Catholics deemed sinners in the eyes of the church are sometimes taken aside and privately advised not to take Communion. But Cheyenne Bishop David Ricken, gay Catholic organizations and a national church spokeswoman said they could not recall any previous instance of a U.S. bishop denying the sacrament to a gay couple in writing.

Now Huskinson and Vader say they are struggling to reconcile their devotion to the church with their devotion to each other.

''You spend half your time defending your gayness to Catholics,'' Vader said, ``and the other half of your time defending your Catholicism to gays.''

The couple, who regularly attended Mass and took Communion, have not been back to St. Matthew's since they received the letter a month and a half ago. Vader said they did not want to make a scene.

The 46-year-old newlyweds -- Vader is a supervisor at a recycling center, Huskinson a coal miner -- ran afoul of a sort of don't-ask-don't-tell policy on the church's part.

''I told my wife in good conscience that if I had known those ladies, and we'd have been having a beer, I'd have just told them to keep everything to themselves,'' parish music director John Chick said. He added that once news like this hits the papers, ``someone's forced to deal with it now, aren't they?''

The parish priest said that after the couple put their engagement and marriage announcements in the local paper, he ran reminders of the church's teachings in the parish bulletin as a warning.

After the Ash Wednesday story, the priest sent this letter: ``It is with a heavy heart, in obedience to the instruction of Bishop David Ricken, that I must inform you that, because of your union and your public advocacy of same-sex unions, that you are unable to receive Communion.''

The bishop said the couple's sex life constitutes a grave sin, ``and the fact that it became so public, that was their choice.''

Last fall, the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops overwhelmingly approved new guidelines that say parishes should welcome gays while telling them to be celibate because the church considers their sexuality ''disordered.'' The bishops said that anyone who knowingly persists in sinful behavior, such as gay sex or using artificial contraception, should refrain from taking Communion.

Sister Mary Ann Walsh, spokeswoman for the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops, said the church allows local bishops to handle decisions on who may take Communion, so there is no record of how many have been barred from receiving the sacrament.

Walsh said most cases she has heard of involved public figures. During the 2004 presidential campaign, Archbishop Raymond Burke of St. Louis said he would deny Communion to John Kerry, a Catholic who supports abortion rights.

As stupid as this is, I honestly don't have any philosophical problem with the Catholic Church in this case. If they want to deny their members certain things, that's their right.

Agree.

Everyone knows that the Catholic church disappoves of homosexuality. I have never understood why some gay people want to be a part of an organization that believes homosexuals will burn in Hell for eternity. There are a few Christian denominations out there that openly welcome gays, why not join those? A "don't ask, don't tell" policy by the Catholic church is the best they can do, and I applaud them for at least going that far.

Well, you've got to account for the fact that these women have probably been raised Catholic their whole lives, and probably have plenty of close friendships with other members of their church. I'd guess they wouldn't want to throw out all the good things they have for the church just because of a stupid bad thing.

why would anyone who's gay want to be Catholic anyway

I know a few pretty strict Catholics and they believe that people who are Protestant Christians are going to hell. Only Catholics are allowed in to heaven under their beliefs. I, personally, don't know enough about the Roman Catholic belief system to know if that is what their faith teaches them, but that might explain why these two don't just join another Christian demonination.

If they're going to hell for being gay, they might as well find a church that embraces them while they're alive.

I can do you one better: if they're going to hell for being gay, why go to church at all?

Brazilian catholicism is the best...since almost everybody claims to be "catholic", nobody really cares.

I know a few pretty strict Catholics and they believe that people who are Protestant Christians are going to hell. Only Catholics are allowed in to heaven under their beliefs. I, personally, don't know enough about the Roman Catholic belief system to know if that is what their faith teaches them, but that might explain why these two don't just join another Christian demonination.

why would anyone want to be Catholic anyway

I can do you one better: if they're going to hell for being gay, why go to church at all?

As stupid as this is, I honestly don't have any philosophical problem with the Catholic Church in this case.

i'm not sure. to me it goes against their overriding philosophy of forgiveness.