Seth Putnam of Anal Cunt / Impaled Northern Moonforest fame



I guess I heard Anal Cunt for the first time 3 or 4 years ago and I was blown away. Like how could someone write a literally 25 second song with beyond distorted riffing with no real rhythm and just scream over it in the most brutal voice ever. Wow and not to mention I was laughing so hard at the hilarity of the lyrics I didn't much care what the music sounded like. Anal Cunt were actually originally planned by Seth to only ever release 1 EP and play 1 show, this was in the late 1980s, they caught on. Seth has the most incredible voice I've ever heard in my voice, in fact I'd pay big money if someone were to bet me there is a better vocalist than him in existence today. His attitude is so admirable too, he is completely unaffected by any comments anyone ever makes about him or his bands. And he's actually a really smart guy, I found out first hand. So here's to you Seth Putnam! don't die!

Some awesome Anal Cunt lyrics:

ART FAG

HE LISTENS TO THE FUCKING SMITHS
HE'S GOT A MUSTACHE
HE WEARS A TRENCHCOAT
HE'S GOT A MUSTACHE
HE WEARS BLACK TIGHTS
HE WRITES POETRY
HE WEARS BLACK LIPSTICK
UNDER HIS MUSTACHE

HE'S GOT A ROLLERCOASTER HAIRCUT
HE DYES IT JET BLACK
WHEN HIS HAIR IS REALLY BROWN
JUST LIKE HIS MUSTACHE
HE WANTS TO BE ROBERT SMITH
BUT WITH A MUSTACHE
HE'S A FUCKING ART FAG
HE'S GOT A MUSTACHE

I NOTICED THAT YOU'RE GAY
i saw you buying a pearl jam record,and i noticed that you're gay
i saw you hanging around in allston,and i noticed that you're gay
i saw you riding around on your rollerblades,and i noticed that you're gay
i saw you getting your tongue pierced,and i noticed that you're gay
i heard you spend all day on the internet,and i noticed that you're gay
i saw you drinking a frappucino,and i noticed that you're gay
i saw you wearing a fucking tree shirt,and i noticed that you're gay
you've got a tribal tattoo, and i noticed that you're gay

THEME FROM THREE'S COMPANY
watch the t.v. show

EVERYONE IN ANAL CUNT IS DUMB
is that scott and tim,or gilbert and lewis
i let them in the band,didn't know that they'd screw us
mike mahan had no brains,tim has no spine
fred's a fucking asshole,and paul would always whine

first we had a spic,a pollack,and a geek
who'll play guitar for anal cunt next week
seth's an alcoholic,tim can't play drums
everyone in anal cunt is dumb

fred had his hair in those stupid fucking braids
tim has a kid,but he never gets laid
john dyed his hair,so we kicked him out of the band
scott's got a dumb tattoo on his hand

JACK KEVORKIAN IS COOL
first you killed an old person
then you went to jail
then you killed another
when you got out on bail

chorus:
old people suck, kevorkian rules, old people suck, jack kevorkian's cool (x 2)

you're in jail again
because you wouldn't sell out
let's get a bulldozer
and break him out

chorus

I SOLD YOUR DOG TO A CHINESE RESTAURANT
I WAS ON MY WAY TO TURN IN ILLEGAL ALIENS TO THE INS
AND YOUR STUPID FUCKING DOG WAS BARKING AT ME
IT SOUNDED LIKE A SINGER FROM A GAY DEATH METAL BAND
I WANTED TO KICK IT IN THE FUCKING FACE

I SOLD YOUR DOG TO A CHINESE RESTAURANT
I SOLD YOUR DOG TO A CHINESE RESTAURANT
I SOLD YOUR DOG TO A CHINESE RESTAURANT
I SOLD YOUR DOG TO A CHINESE RESTAURANT

AFTER I BEAT THE FUCKING SHIT OUT OF IT
I WANTED TO THROW IT THROUGH YOUR FUCKING WINDOW
BUT I NEEDED MONEY TO BUY SOME MORE WHISKEY
SO I SOLD IT TO A CHINESE RESTAURANT

I SOLD YOUR DOG TO A CHINESE RESTAURANT
I SOLD YOUR DOG TO A CHINESE RESTAURANT
I SOLD YOUR DOG TO A CHINESE RESTAURANT
I SOLD YOUR DOG TO A CHINESE RESTAURANT

YOUR FAMILY ORDERED PU PU PLATTER
YOU DIDN'T KNOW WHAT YOU WERE EATING
IT WAS YOUR FUCKING GAY FAITHFUL DOG
WHILE YOU WERE AT THE RESTAURANT I LIT YOUR HOUSE ON FIRE

All Our Fans Are Gay
Why do you think we throw stuff at you?

You own all our cd's- you're gay, you're gay
You own all our 7"s- you're gay, you're gay
You bought all our t-shirts- you're gay, you're gay
You go to all our shows- you're gay, you're gay

Chorus: All our fans are gay (x4)

You think you know what we are singing about- you're wrong
You think we care about the underground- you're wrong
You think we won't fuck up your club- you're wrong
You think we care if you like us- you're wrong

Chorus

If we're nice to you, it's because we're broke
Or unless you got some drugs to smoke
When the drugs are gone, then we are too
Then we'll go back to making fun of you

Fan voice: "But I've supported you guys for so long"
FAGGOT!

Limp Bizkit Think They're Black, But They're Just Gay
Fred Durst is a fucking faggot
He thinks he's black, but he's just gay
He cancelled a show cuz he sprained his ankle
He's also a fucking midget

Chorus:
You're not fucking black, you're just fucking gay (x2)
You're fucking gay

The guitarist wears a mask
To hide the cum stains on his face
They're the gayest band I've ever seen
And I've seen the Culture Club live

Chorus

Fred wears a hat to hide his baldness
I refuse to believe blacks think he's cool
I wish he'd beaten and raped by some black guy
And see if he still wants to be black

BEATING UP HIPPIES FOR THEIR DRUGS AT A PHISH CONCERT (THRASH OF THE TITANS LP)
YOU'VE GOT NO FUCKING MONEY AND YOUR GIRLFRIEND IS UGLY
SO I STOLE YOUR DRUGS (X2)
YOUR VANS A PIECE OF SHIT WITH A DEAD STICKER ON IT
SO I STOLE YOUR DRUGS (X2)

FIRST I STOLE YOUR NITROUS
THEN I STOLE YOUR ACID
THEN I STOLE YOUR MUSHROOMS
THEN I KICKED YOUR ASS
THEN I STOLE YOUR POT
THEN I STOLE YOU R BEER
THEN I STOLE YOUR TICKETS
AND SOLD THEM FOR CRACK

REPEAT EVERYTHING

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remember when maniacal clown posted that picture of the k in his head?

On Seth's head?

no. his own head.

My thread hates you.

brilliant...absolutely brilliant

Lets all rack up some posts in honor of this shitty band.

Sounds like someone isnt really secure in thier own sexuality. I'm suprised there's not a line that says..."Pound me in the arse, i noticed that you're gay".

No, he's secure, he's just in a coma.

Well, it looks like Mastodon and High on Fire were where he is in that picture (above his left sholder), so i guess he could be an ok dude.

I honestly don't know for sure, but I'd be willing to bet he hates both those bands. That pic was taken in an underground club in Tokyo, so people just wrote random shit on the walls. Seth rarely even listens to music so he says.

Are those really his lyrics? Those are hilarious

Yes they are. http://sethputnam.com/aclyrics.htm read some of those at your own risk, and know he's just joking.

Read the one about "YOUR KID DIED AND I LAUGHED" or something like that. Hilarious.

YOU ARE AN INTERIOR DECORATOR
faggot(x4)

you want to paint my walls pink,you want to give me a flowered sink
you put a statue of holly johnson in my hall and a poster of joe bonni on my wall

interior decorator(x2)

repeat verse

interior decorator(x2)

faggot(x4)

YOU LOOK ADOPTED
your real mother was a hooker,your real father couldn't get laid
your mother left you in a dumpster,you were adopted by two gays

chorus:
you look adopted(x4)

you hate father and son picnics,you hate the p.t.a.
you won't bring friends to your house,you've got two fathers and thier both fucking gay

chorus

this is so fucking retarded its awesome