Post subject: Simpons EotM #13: THE HOMER THEY FALL (season 8)
Posted: Wed Aug 16, 2006 4:26 am
Stone's Bitch
Joined: Mon Oct 18, 2004 4:25 am Posts: 17123 Location: Maspeth, NY Gender: Male
When Homer is beaten up by the parents of Bart's bullies, Moe notices he can take a blow to the head without falling. With a long history in boxing, Moe talks Homer into becoming a boxer and he assigns himself as manager. Homer's strategy is to take the punches until the opponent wears himself out, then when they are down to give them a nudge. His rise gains attention of Lucius Sweet, who wants Homer to fight Drederick Tatum, to which Moe accepts. Moe promises Sweet that Homer will stay up for three rounds, and promises Marge that he will throw in the towel as soon as Homer appears in any danger. When the fight begins, it is clear that Homer will not last the three rounds. Moe airlifts Homer to safety.
Reminder: if you want an episode to be featured in EotM, PM me your suggestions and I'll add them to the list.
Marge: Night vision goggles? A bathroom scale from a soviet sub? A suede briefcase case? [growls] Anyone who needs this kind of status symbol must have some terrible emotional problems.
Homer: [gasping] Marge, look! "The world's best jacket." If I had this, it would show everybody! [angrily] Show everybody!
Jimbo: Hey Simpson, wanna trade belts?
Bart: Well, not really, 'cause yours is just a piece of extension cord.
[close-in of a cord wrapped around Jimbo's pants]
Kearney: Hey, dude, he's ragging on your cord.
Jimbo: Get him!
Homer: [gasps] You know Lucius Sweet?! He's one of the biggest names in boxing! He's exactly as rich and as famous as Don King, and he looks just like him, too!
Moe: Yeah, he was my manager. Back when I was Gorgeous, everybody wanted a piece of me. But somehow, I just never made it to the big time.
Homer: Why not?
Moe: 'Cause I got knocked out forty times in a row. That, plus politics. You know, it's all politics.
Homer: [glaring] Lousy democrats.
Hibbert: You have an absolutely unique genetic condition known as "Homer Simpson syndrome".
Homer: [moaning] Oh, why me?
_________________ Gotta say it now.... better loud than too late.
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CBG: Yes, finally! I would like to return your quote, unquote
Ultimate Belt.
Salesman: I see. Do you have a receipt, quote, unquote, sir?
CBG: No, I do not have a receipt. I won it as a door prize at the
Star Trek Convention, although I find their choice of prize
highly illogical, as the average Trekker has no use for a
medium-sized belt.
Salesman: Whoa! Whoa! A fat, sarcastic Star Trek fan. You must be a
devil with the ladies. [sarcastic wink]
CBG: Hey, I... [sighs] That... Oh...
Salesman: Gee, I hate to let you down, Casanova, but, uh, no receipt, no
return. [walks away]
Bart: I'll give you four bucks for it.
CBG: [sighs, then sells him the belt]
Very well. I must hurry back to my comic book store, where I
dispense the insults rather than absorb them.
It's a decent episode. B-
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Joined: Mon Oct 18, 2004 12:07 pm Posts: 437 Location: Melbourne, Australia Gender: Male
Reporter: Champ, do you feel remorse for your crime?
Tatum: Oh, yes. Believe me, my god, if I could turn back the clock on my mother's stair-pushing, I would certainly, reconsider it.
Reporter: Drederick, ah, what do you think of Homer Simpson?
Tatum: I think he's a good man. I like him. I got nothing against him, but I'm definitely gonna make orphans of his children.
Reporter: Uh, you know, they do have a mother, Champ?
Tatum: Yes, but I would imagine that she would die of grief
Lucius: Thank you, thank you. But the champ has no time for further queries. This parole hearing is over.
Homer: Son, there's only one thing punks like that understand: squealing. You've got to squeal to every teacher and every grown-up you can find. Coming to me was a good start
Homer: That cactus is right. I have only one chance. I've got to knock him out.
Jimbo: He's turning left!
Moe: I gotta be honest with you, Homer. I didn't bring you up here to
show you my new tar paper.
Homer: You didn't?
Moe: No. Homer, how would you like to be heavyweight champion of the
world?
Homer: Oh, sure.
and when Homer walks down the runway with the song Why Can't We Be Friends? is fucken hilarous.
_________________ "Alcohol and night swimming...it's a winning combination" - Lenny Leonard
and when Homer walks down the runway with the song Why Can't We Be Friends? is fucken hilarous.
i love that part. plus the boxers homer fights in moe's - i forget the names but thet are classic as well
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Joined: Mon Oct 18, 2004 4:25 am Posts: 17123 Location: Maspeth, NY Gender: Male
Moe: Okay, you're fighting a guy named Boxcar Bob.
Homer: Brawled his way up from the boxcars, did he?
Moe: Uh, no, not yet, he still lives at the trainyard. But he's a hungry young fighter. In fact, he's actually fighting for a sandwich.
Moe: All right, Homer, I'm not gonna lie to you. There's a good chance you can beat Tatum. But you gotta visualize how you're gonna win, okay?
Homer: Gotcha.
[dreams on about his victory]
Announcer: A congenital heart defect has apparently felled Tatum moments before he could step into the ring.
_________________ Gotta say it now.... better loud than too late.
I pretty much agree. I recently watched it and it actually wasn't as good as I remember. But yea..definitely not bad or anything.
I don't know how much of follow the UFC, but there is a guy named Cabbage Coreira who can take a hit like you wouldn't fucking believe. I always compare him to Homer Simpson. I'm certain he has "Homer Simpsons syndrome" with a layer of fluid 1/8 thicker than normal, haha.
Moe: They called me Kid Gorgeous. Later on it was Kid Presentable. Then Kid gruesome. And finally...Kid Moe.
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