So I have one month left in my life pre-child. I'm wondering what the fuck to do with myself over the next 32 days. Anyone have any good ideas? someone that has kids that can look back and say "I wish I did this before the kid" or something you may have forgotten to take care of ahead of time?

sleep...

jerk off in the guest room.

*in your wifes mouth...

start a savings account in their name.

did that yesterday

and prepare yourself for the fact that you will grow apart from your childless friends i keeo in touch with very few of the friends i had before my son was born(though he is almost 9 now), and your childless friends don't really care about every last milestone the baby has (first burp, smile, spit-up ect--you get the point)and will get very tired of you talking about it
but really having kids is cool, just prepare to give up the life you have now for a new(but exciting) one
and the savings account idea is a good one
anytine the baby(and even as it gets older) gets a gift of money (which happens a lot), put it into savings. Also put away as much as you can afford even if its only $10 a week

First and foremost, SLEEP!!!!!! Any I don't mean just get enough sleep, I mean, lounge in bed until noon for a couple days, even if you feel like getting up. Just enjoy the feeling of getting up exactly when you want to get up. Trust me, you will never do this again unless your kids stay over at somebody else's house.

Second, one of the great things about not having kids was that after work, I would come home to a quiet house, turn on SportsCenter and just relax for 15 minutes or so before figuring out what I was going to do for the rest of the night. Now, as soon as I get home, I am walking into a three ring circus take over as a ringleader for a few minutes.

Finally, think of having kids in this light. Take a midget and get him drunk and pump him full of sugar at the same time. Having a 5 year old is like having a drunk midget full of energy that wants your attention a lot.

Just to give you perspective, I have a 5 yeard old son and 2 year old daughter. I can't imagine having more than 2 kids, I think it would be full-scale chaos with more than 2.

Oh, and be prepared that during meal times, you will get up about 15 times during the meal to do one of the following: Clean up spilt milk, get a different spoon to replace the one that was thrown on the floor, heat something up, cool something down........

in other words...ilium is saying GOOD LUCK!

We aren't "together" so I doubt she would be up for a kiss let alone a load in her mouth.

hahahaha. I actually lived w my sister while she was pregnant until the time her kid (not mine, I swear) was 3. I know the chaos involved in dealing with a young kid so i'm prepared for that part.

Baby. Proof.

Stock up on baby ora-gel and baby gas drops.

Always have extra binkies, or whatever comfort item they attach themselves too.

Never leave the house without a change of clothes for either of you. They spit up a lot. Even once they're passed the spit up stage, any too-full mouthful of food or giggle at the wrong time during dinner can lead to a pretty impressive amount of projectile vomit.

Since you probably won't have the kid full time, make sure and find out if he/she's particular about any specific bottle type or nipple type they use. No one ever thinks of this, but I've known a couple kids who would scream for hours and die of hunger before sucking on a nipple they did'nt like.

Expect to watch the same cartoon over and over and over. And Over.

It's easier to get a fussy baby to sleep if you keep moving. Standing and rocking the baby back and forth works well. The idea is that their eyes can't focus on anything and want to close faster. They're also soothed by movement.


That's all I can think about right now . . .

live, dammit... LIVE!

I got about 3 weeks left and sleep is all i do now.

Well today they said she may go at any time now because the is 3cm dilated and 95% something else with the cervix. When I heard that it was the first time during the entire pregnancy that I got nervous. I was preparing to start getting mentally prepared for this next week, 2 weeks early isnt so bad though.

i don't want to get too personal so forgo this question if it is, but are there legal arrangements in terms of who gets the baby and when?

james, i know we havent always seen eye to eye on here, but i hope things work out not only for you, but your wife and the kid

good luck man, i'm sure everything will go fine.

Don't hold me to this because it changes almost daily but as of last night I am back living in the house with her and will be for at least the first few weeks after he/she is born. If we can get along and be civil we will stay together, if we can't get along we will sell the house in the spring and split time with the kid.