The incessant beeping of the alarm clock is clumsily extinguished. Christmas morning. He slowly rises, stretching toward the heavens in one final yawn. A quick peek out the window reaffirms his notion that this will be another warm, sunny Texas Christmas. If the lack of snow is the only thing wrong with his life right now then maybe he does have it pretty good after all, he ponders. Donning his robe, he makes his way toward the bathroom, careful not to be seen by any family members. He turns the shower on, removes his clothing, and steps in. The cool blast of water hits his face and he is instantly refreshed. Now wide awake, he begins to think over the past year. “It’s been one of ups and downs, that’s for sure,” he softly mutters aloud. It has seen many changes, from his moving to a new town, finding a job, even moving to a place of his own. Even though he has had trouble paying his utility bill, and even having his power shut off for a brief period, he is relieved to be on his own now, away from his former irksome roommates. A small smile forms on his face as he thinks of how great the new piece of art he purchased looks in his living room. He steps out of the shower, admiring his chiseled body before drying off. A quick brush through the hair and he’s ready to spend what is hopefully a great Christmas day with his family. As he enters the dining room his brother and mom are already up, enjoying a cup of coffee. He kisses his brother on top of the head, and gives his mother a soft, playful punch on the arm. After pouring a cup of coffee he sits at the table and has an intimate discussion with his brother regarding papal infallibility. The rest of the family slowly filters in. The family shares a quick prayer, and distributes their gifts to each other. As Reid begins to open his presents his mind quickly goes over the subtle hints he gave to his family for the things he wanted most this year. Autographed copy of 2666 by Roberto Bolano? Check. Yo La Tengo MTV unplugged CD? Check. Leather ukulele case? Check. Not a bad haul this year, he thinks. After the lunch the family goes to the nursing home to visit Reid’s grandmother, and participate in the afternoon caroling session. After they return home, a sudden, terrifying thought enters Reid’s mind. After celebrating Christmas with his girlfriend’s family two nights before, his girlfriend came to his place for a few drinks and alone time. The few drinks turned into 7 or 8 and in a fit of drunken passion, they removed their clothing and made sudden, dirty love. Putting on a condom didn’t even begin to enter his mind. “How could I be so irresponsible?” he angrily says to himself. He goes to the bathroom, splashes some water on his face, and sinks down to the floor. He pulls out his cell phone, turning to the only thing he knows to do at this point. He scrolls through his contacts to the M’s and accesses one Mickey Shea. In a brief, to the point text message he tells Mickey what happened.
Mickey: Ouch, man. And you’re sure you didn’t pull out?
Reid: I was pretty wasted so I’m sure I just didn’t think to.
Mickey: Yeah, I’ve been there pal.
Reid: I don’t know what to do, Mickey.
Mickey: Well, how many times did she cum?
Reid: I’m not sure, maybe 5.
Mickey: Cool story, bro.

I want to ride Leonard.

Lenny, you forgot to sign in to your Mickey account for the OP.

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merry christmas, lenny.

thanks...you too, john

give laura my regards

i will, lenny. i will.

did you get all the crap you wanted?

there wasn't really much i was pining for this year...i had a few things on my amazon wishlist my sister got me...and my parents got me a digital camera...it's neat to have but i probably wouldn't have purchased one on my own

how about you?

hi lenny

hey doug

i got coal again

does your own digital camera mean more pictures of lenny on RM in 2010???

i will take a picture of a different part of my body each day

starting with your breasts

i haven't decided if i'm going to include them...they're getting a big malice-saggy

Lenny, I had you pegged as a Kwanzaa type of guy, what with the Pontiac and all.

i took that bit*h through a car wash today during lunch because the migratory birds reeked havoc on it yesterday