I've lived at this address a little over a year now. A lot of that time was spent sharing a stairwell with a cute, friendly waitress at a local bar. Back in March, she moved in with her boyfriend across town and I had everything to myself. I could turn my stereo up, I could talk on the phone to people without being overheard through the thin walls, I could live out my days in quiet desperation.

However, I was lonely. I came to this board for companionship and conversation while I played my loud records for nobody but myself. Nightly, I secretly prayed for a friend in real life that I could once again share a stairwell with and work out agreements about locking the stairwell door, taking the trash to the curb, etc. In short, I missed having someone that I could share a cigarette with on the stoop during idle parts of the day.

A few days ago, my prayers were answered in the form of my former neighbor's 70 year old father. He offered me a slice of banana bread a few minutes ago from his son's restaurant, and started complaining about how dark the stairwell is. He also recommended that we "do something about the maniacs that drive 90 mph down this street", but I had no real solution for that problem. I look forward to this new era at the 2646 1/2 address, though I don't plan on picking up smoking again. I'll just sit on the stoop and listen to the ramblings of an old man.

I'm picturing

Congratulations on the new neighbor.

Everyone has a story to tell. Especially the oldsters. That old guy is probably posting about you on the Lawrence Welk fansite.

Outstanding.

Actually, he's clearing his throat right now. Loudly. It almost makes me wonder if he's trying to get my attention.

HE IS, HE IS! I just KNOW it.

Go to him. And ask to borrow a cup of sugar.

The guy just gave me some banana bread. I feel like asking for sugar would make me appear ungrateful.

Actually, imma offer him some coffee.

That actually sounds great. I really wish I could embrace life and people the way you do, Reid.

Clearing the throat usually is the way old people ask for your attention.

turns out his doctor says that he can't have coffee, and he seemed like I was interrupting him. I guess this union will progress on his terms. I'm okay with that.

Shoulda asked for a cup of sugar...

You really make the best threads ever. Another job well done.

Just give him the fucking coffee

What I think I'll quickly find disturbing is that this man is probably living the same life at 70 as I am at 27. Is this what karma is sort of about?

nothing ever changes, just your prostate

Until you hear a PJ lp spinning from his place at 2 am... don't sweat it.

Does he have the internet?

does he like australians and bob dylan?