The last friend I made was the woman I worked with over christmas - and the family has just made a complaint to her agency. In my other half's words ' grandma likes black people, as long as they're not in her house'.

So what am I supposed to tell my black friend. As I'm being used as a go-between?

This is a rather strongly titled thread, don't you think?

I don't think so because it will mean I have to stop contact with her since my family could destroy her career. Why would she want to be friends with me now?

what is your job?

i don't get whats going on here

hmmm. i guess he hooked up with a woman over christmas, and her family made a complaint to her agency (escort service i'm guessing?), then his wife found out and mentioned her grandma hates black people in her house, so he has to have a threeway with grandma and the black girl to smooth things over.

oh wait, he is a she. my theory is wrong.

as moses said, don't let the truth get in the way of a good story

I made friends with a woman I used to work with as a carer. Unfortunately the client doesn't like black people and the employer is my family. It's a shame because the employee is quizzing me about anything that may have been said, and the family are telling me stories of things grandma has said about the woman behind my back. (I'm pretty sure grandma is giving the carer a hard time, as I've seen it with my own eyes). I really don't know what to say to the other carer. ' Grandma's kind of racist, but hey ho, that's the nature of the business, good luck, sorry you met us'.

That explains a lot more.

But I'd have to say I'd recommend explaining the situation to the woman honestly. It's not like racist old people is a totally outlandish concept.

Obviously find your grandmother a different caretaker. She does have some right to have a carer she is comfortable with even if she's being a bit bigoted about the whole thing. And no need to subject someone to her who is going to be put through a hard time.

Well, grandma's usual caretaker is back, so she's fine. It's just the other carer. She was fine about racism in care work, only now she wants to know what's been said. Fortunately my family don't tell me much.

If you lived in the south here in the States, life would be so much simpler for you.

those black people were slaves, ruddo.

well unless she's an idiot she should know that racism isn't hereditery.

That's not really the point. I don't know what the agency will do, and I will find out from the family what the complaint was about on Sunday. She'll probably lose her contract with the agency, I don't like to ask.
Don't forget, i'm family. The carer before her was asking questions about my paycheck because she didn't trust me. She thought I was being payed more than her.

Family/someone I knew for two weeks/family/someone I knew for two weeks...

Okay, I guess what I'm not getting is isn't the rest of your family a little bit more levelheaded than your grandmother?

Cause I know that if my crazy racist grandma was trying to get people fired the rest of my family wouldn't hesitate to apologize to the lady and try to explain the situation to the agency. At the least, if I were in your position and nobody else was trying to step in, I would. I would also remind grandma that making up false charges is illegal. All this assuming the complaint is fabricated, which is the assumption I've made after reading your posts.

What do you know about UK law?

no lennie briscoe

"I'll sue you in England!"