This is quickly becoming my biggest pet peeve.

Arrrrgh! Buy your own damn groceries, bitch!!!!

I shot the first roommate who did this to me. It never happened again.

You mean you never shot one again cause you ended up in jail?

Jail is for schlups.

And sissies who don't know how to properly dispose of a body.

hello..... homedepot=chipper/shredder=problem resolved

that's why i don't have a roommate.

i was thinking more like this:

Shit on his pillow.

{"We are now going to progess to some steps that are a bit more difficult"}
{"Ready?"
{"This is the battle"}
{"Of Sex"}
{"As an animal act"}
{"Fucked up by your emotions"}

[Verse 1 - MC Paul Barman]
I faxed attorney's
My housemates that smoke crack and practice taxidermy
Didn't lack tact like the sackhole with wack black leather German backpack and stacked (?)
The worst besides involving civilians is being a lazy teacher
It's hard to embelish on how hellishly selfish the nemises is
He drove the great housemate Kate off the premiseses
You're the biggest A-HOLE in the world! You're crazy! We're both right
Your mom was nice on the phone
what happened you? I'd like to crap in your brew
A 12-pack of (?) when your napping oo-oo
I'll set fire to your bed, let the flames shave your head
For the (?) you said
I'd leave you for dead if I could get away with it
You even taped up the kitty door so no one could play with it
You did the same thing to Linden
???????????????????????
I wish you were going to the hell we've been in but it doesn't exist
And there's no god either
No real mortal leader
I need a breather!

{"Poor, misreable, misfit, reject, loser, outlaw"}
{"And begin"}

[Verse 2 - MC Paul Barman]
I don't need to be subtle to leave you befuddled
Cuase you're too lazy to write a rebuttle
Can't finish grad school think thats cool but it's sad
If I wanted to watch Football I'd live with my dad
I make rap masterpieces
You can't complete your crap masters thesis?
{"Loser"}
Just count calories and manufactour allergies
You make 5 times our salaries but you're late with the rent
On time with the cable
You watch Friends while we are friends
All you're giving this house is crumbs on the table
From a Food-not-bombs bagle
Wont lend me your books but there's dust on your Hegel
I nearly puked when you showed up to U.S. Maple
Think your at Chapel Hill stable?
Think you're subletting through April?
We're getting you off the lease while you are cause
You're a bigger A-HOLE than I'm considered my my lab....

{"Poor, misreable, misfit, reject, loser, outlaws"}
{"And begin"}

[MC Paul Barman (Talking)]
Look, when I'm being a pompous bastard
my friends love me enough to bring me back down to their... planet.
And so, this is a real stretch to say to you because I don't love you like, you know, they love me.
But your making sure that nobody loves you, you're alienating everybody!
So just beware, or else you'll be alone.

{"Poor, misreable, misfit, reject, loser, outlaws"}
{"Yeah... outlaws"}

You're a bee-itch. I hate you. Meow.

my roommate is 280 pounds. i know better than to go anywhere near his stuff.

So you're on the run then...I'm calling you in. I was going to use the term, " I'm gonna get all James Dangle on your ass," but then the fact that he is gay on Reno 911, well, sending the wrong message.

i've never had a roommate

that's really not the topic being discussed in this thread

takes one to know one

i ordered the soup, not salad

i haven't seen my roommate, Bill, in quite some time