Should be an interesting week or so for me. Gonna be a drunken one for sure. Any husbands out there have their wife leave them for a week or more to go on a vacation? What did you do?

My dad goes fishing when my mom leaves.

i see a lot of masturbation in your future Club.

"fishing"? is that what he calls it?

my fiancee had a summer internship in indiana( im in Va) for 3 months, but she is back now

I already ordered a 2 day trial at mrskin.com for $5. I'm into celebrity soft-core porn. the wife will understand though

lots of drinkin and not picking the house up. dirty dishes, unmade bed, then the night before she gets back i clean house like a mofo.

my wife is a neat freak.

I hate to do this to you, but I simply have to tell this story:

Earlier this summer at a bar in Seattle, on a pretty crowded night, there were two bachelorette parties.

Just for kicks, I ordered the only kind of beer they serve in a can there. So I'm out on the patio with it when one of the brides-to-be grabs the beer right out of my hand. I'm like "wtf?" and she says "hang on." So I'm thinking...what am I gonna do here, start yelling at this chick in a wedding veil? So I let it go...and she starts denting up the can like it's a piece of origami paper or something.

Anyways, I'm obviously a little ticked that this girl just stole my drink (oh yeah, btw, she knocked it back pretty quick).

Now to the point of my story...one of her friends offered to replace the drink for me. So she latches on, drags me to the bar, and asks what I wanted. I said "surprise me" and whaddaya know, she comes back with a Sex On The Beach. This girl was 27, married, and up visiting from Portland...and you could tell she didn't really want to be married at that age. All the signs were there - not to brag or anything but this would have been probably the easiest score of my entire life. I could have had this chick in a cab on the way back to my place in no time flat. But based on the rock on her finger, I had to get the fuck out of the situation.

Long story short...careful about letting your wife travel on her own unless you really trust her. After that night, I might never look at women the same way again.

You might be on to something.

Paint the hoose, write her a poem/short story.

My wife went to Washington state for a friend's bachelorette party and said she led this desperate dude on at the bar. She said she bought him a Sex On The Beach and had him all worked up before she ditched him and went home with the other girls. She said that dude was probably masturbating into his wrist sweatband all night.

You were living in Portland at the time?

Damn, I forgot the part where she lied and said she was from Portland.

Hey man, I'm just throwing a life experience story out there. This kind of shit probably happens all the time...and there are plenty of dudes out there who don't give a fuck about the wedding ring.

dude, change your ways (I'm serious). Be a changed man when she gets back, she won't know what the fucked knocked her off her feet.

eh, he would just rather have the pakaki knock her off her feet

Last time my wife went away I went to a tittie bar.
I can't say that was a bad choice.

Also, in the absence of her nagging, I suddenly felt motivated to do all the chores that she normally nags me to do.

When the pussy's away, the mice will play with themselves.

So what you're saying is that he's going to place his hand upon his penis and, moving it in an up and down fashion, will cause himself to ejaculate and therefore satisfy his sexual desire at that particular time?